WHERE OUR ADDICTION STARTED

Addictions are most often the result of trauma. As children we see or hear things which cause us huge amounts of stress. Things such as something bad happening to someone you love. Or being in a place without your parents especially your mom who always comforts and holds you when you are hurt or scared. Growing up on an Indian reserve I saw a lot of bad things such as people drinking and fighting which horrified us kids. Especially Friday nights when all the parents returned home from the hotel drunk and lot of times would end up with people screaming, hollering at each other in an all-out brawl. The way we dealt with it was when our parents left next day to get back to their partying us kids rounded up all the bottles we could find and pooled all our money together and head to the store on the highway where we bought candies and pop. That was our way of covering up the trauma from the night before and to say 'It's all okay' and to re-assure ourselves that everything is fine. Because Saturday night is probably going to be just like Friday night all over again!

We learned things as children. We learned to cover up the pain and the trauma....by doing things which made us feel good and to forget. But we also started ourselves down a road toward addiction which is how we dealt with stress and trauma when we got older. We tend to make bad choices as adults because we never grew up properly and in many regards we are still like children. We never matured like we should have, we develop physical problems because of our smoking, drinking and our drugs. We don't think of God because we think he doesn't care for people like us. And we shoot off the handle at all the little things. We blame others which of course means we don't have to look at ourselves or do anything to make our lives better because IT'S NOT OUR PROBLEM.

Addiction is people acting out their trauma. Most often from their childhood. Problem is if you don't nip it in the bud and get help it gets worse and worse. And each time you deal with it, and each time 'you fall off the wagon' it's harder and harder to get back on. That is the life of an addict. That is true whether you are addicted to drugs, alcohol, gambling, sex, TV, or what have you. There is no way out except to make that decision to fix it! Because 'hey we are all broke'.